Movie Review Sunday

The Avengers – 2012 (PG-13)

Netflix says: An all-star lineup of superheroes -- including Iron Man, the Incredible Hulk and Captain America -- team up to save the world from certain doom. Working under the authority of S.H.I.E.L.D., can our heroes keep the planet at peace?

Matt says: Wow! Wowee wow wow wow! I went into “The Avengers” with high hopes (I had read several reviews that gushed over the film), but I still needed to see it for myself before judging… I have been burned before. Walking out after the meaty 2:20 run time, I not only felt that it was more than worth the seventeen dollar NYC ticket price for a 3D film, but that I was involved in the events of the film in some way. Yes, I got totally absorbed into the film. I have said before that Joss Whedon is the ultimate fan-boy, and it still holds true here. I have never seen a movie that fully captures the experience of a thirteen year old reading a comic book as I did with this film… and that’s a good, good thing. I remember laying on my bed with the latest X-Men or Fantastic Four comic in the mid-80s, being totally and fully engrossed in the 2 dimensional story-line and melodrama of the cheap pulp. There was macho bravado, poor attempts at humor (that actually work), women in skin tight outfits, and other pubescent trappings. Yet, there was also life lessons and chivalry beneath the soap opera story-lines. It may not be high art, but it is highly entertaining. Whedon not only made an excellent super hero film, but he also did it so perfectly that it actually is a comic book come alive. And, don’t get me started on the cast’s dynamic chemistry or that the film is significantly enhanced by viewings of the character’s solo films. “The Avengers” feels like the culmination of a four year/four film build-up… they didn’t know what they were going to do at the time, but Whedon solved that problem with experience and grace. Don’t expect a life changing or deep film here, but do expect a fucking great time. The Hulk stole the show (with Downey Jr.’s Iron Man taking a close second), but everyone did their parts to make this a total and utter blast. The 3D may have been done in post, and it was a little dark because of it, but it didn’t make the film any less entertaining. I recommend seeing this on the big screen as it’s the epitome of a perfect summer blockbuster. 5 stars.

Green Lantern - 2011 (PG-13)

Netflix says: Hal Jordan (Ryan Reynolds), a brash, talented test pilot, is chosen by an alien force of warriors to become their representative on Earth and use his new powers as the Green Lantern to promote order and justice before conflict destroys his world. Despite being the first human to wear the ring that bestows his abilities, Hal must combat villain Parallax. Fellow pilot Carol Ferris (Blake Lively) aids Hal in his quest to save the galaxy.

Matt says: You know, it’s not as fun as “Iron Man” or “Thor”, or as deep as the Nolan Batman flicks, but “Green Lantern” isn’t as bad as critics made it out to be. In fact, with a little research into the background of the characters, it can be a satisfactory film. I mean, the enemy is a giant, sentient mass of fear that absorbs the fear from people (in effect, killing them painfully and horribly) that keeps growing with each kill. That’s some scary shit right there. I think the mythology is so dense that it lost a little something in transition from page to screen. I’m sure fanboys had as much to like as well as hate about it because of that. Ryan Reynolds got a bad rap too, but I have a feeling a lot of those remarks were from the trailer that made it seem he smugly quips throughout the film as if trying to do his best Robert Downey Jr. impression. Yeah, so there’s a little mugging, but for the most part he plays the hero as well as, say, Christopher Reeve or Chris Hemsworth. I’ll tell you, the movie beats the crap out of that godawful “Superman Returns” and Brandon “The Mannequin” Routh’s dull, lifeless performance. “Green Lantern” is lengthy, can be a bit slow at times, and is missing the humor of the Marvel films of late (why so serious, DC?), but as a solid, stoic superhero movie, it succeeds. I would’ve given it 3 1/2 stars if it wasn’t for the crap DVD rental version. The distributers, more than likely to try and force you to buy the Blu-Ray, released a murky, grainy, non-anamorphic rental version. You know, I don’t mind you forcing trailers or pulling the extras from the disc, Warner Brothers, but at least release a clear print! Where’s your sense of quality for your product? If I bought this DVD and this was the quality it came with, I would send that shit right back. 3 stars.

Batman: Year One – 2011 (PG-13)

Netflix says: This animated movie finds Bruce Wayne as he first assumes the identity of crime fighter Batman, crossing paths with Gotham's top cop, James Gordon. When Catwoman and the mob unleash a crime spree, it's up to the caped crusader to deliver justice.

Matt says: I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Frank Miller is insane. His later works push the levels of misogyny and taste to an over-blown, cringe-worthy level. “How can someone that crappy still continue to be employed?” you might ask. Well, let’s set the way back machine to the mid-80s. Comics were reaching a creative peak that began in the 70s and were only getting better. Frank Miller was a hot commodity, and for good reason: his takes on Batman’s origin and autumn years had a noir, adult edge. And, without Miller, we wouldn’t have the Batman as we know him to be today. “Batman: Year One” is that origin story. It contains much that become on-going themes in the rest of Miller’s early and best works (the tortured protagonist, the “tough as nails” hooker with a heart, corruption in high places, and the flawed hero). This animated adaption is pretty good. Miller’s story is kept intact and still has the impact of the comic, the animation is decent (sometimes actually copying frames from the comic), and it’s only a brisk hour long… but, it’s missing something. First of all, the voice acting is horrendous. Could they really not get any decent voice actors for this? I don’t care if you were on the OC, Ben McKenzie, you’re not a voice actor. Also, the filmmakers decided to embrace the minimalistic feel of the comic and let it ride. Unfortunately, that makes some of the most action oriented scenes less than action-packed. Normally I am against deviation, but this would’ve benefitted from more “oomph”. Finally, Miller’s voiceovers in the comic work because they are narrating the frames on the page and give insight into the heroes’ minds. In this, especially with the soft, non-threatening voice actor (I’m looking at you, McKenzie) who does Batman’s voice, it feels hackneyed. With live action and animation, you can utilize the fact that things are in motion to cover any voiceover needs. Those nit-picks aside, I did enjoy it. I’m glad that Warner Brothers is continuing with their PG-13 animated comic adaptions and am looking forward to seeing what’s next. 3 1/2 stars.

X-Men: First Class – 2011 (PG-13)

Netflix says: In this exciting prequel to the X-Men series, Charles Xavier (James McAvoy) and Erik Lehnsherr (Michael Fassbender) -- the future Professor X and Magneto -- are best friends dedicated to harnessing their powers and promoting the education of fellow mutants during the turbulent 1960s. The duo works together to stop a powerful adversary that threatens mankind, but their ideological differences drive them apart and turn them into ferocious enemies.

Matt says: You know, in the past few years Marvel has been doing a damn fine job apologizing for Ang Lee’s “Hulk”, “The Fantastic Four” movies, and the abysmal “X-Men 3” and “Wolverine” films. “Iron Man”, “Thor”, and “Captain America” have all been fun, exciting, well made films. It took a long time, but Hollywood was finally bitch-slapped into taking superhero movies seriously (with a huge nod to Christopher Nolan for his part in it all). “X-Men: First Class” keeps with that trend, redeeming the series. No, there’s no Patrick Stewart or Ian McKellen, but what you do get is all the things that are making Marvel films so much fun of late. They stay true to the comics in theme and add enough inside references to make comic fans giggle with glee. But, the inconsistences in movie-compared-to-comic in “First Class” are so grand that it might as well ignore 40 years of print. As a stand-alone experience, I look at it as the history of the X-Men that the comics never covered, in an alternate reality. By focusing on the subjects that made the comic so good, “First Class” surpasses the third X-Men film and the Wolverine film to become the most effective of the series since part 2. It’s not quite to “Iron Man” levels of greatness, but it’s pretty.. pretty.. pretty good. Oh, and it has Kevin Bacon as a Nazi evil bad guy! Come on, tell me you don’t want to see that. And, best of all, a cameo by a fat, old Michael Ironside!! Michael. Fucking. Ironside!!! A 3 1/2 star film, bumped by Bacon and Ironside’s inclusion to make it 4 stars.

Captain America: The First Avenger – 2011 (PG-13)

Netflix says: Marvel launches another super franchise with this action-packed origin story, which follows Steve Rogers (Chris Evans) as he volunteers for a secret experiment during World War II. Transformed into a superhero named Captain America, Steve goes after the Axis. With his perfect physique and heightened reflexes -- and his sidekick, Bucky (Sebastian Stan) -- Steve battles the Red Skull (Hugo Weaving), a super soldier created by Italian fascists.

Matt says: Well, I’ll be damned… I actually enjoyed this. I never was a big Captain America fan. I mean, even the name turned me off as cheesy, patriotic bullshit. But, due to decent writing, good performances, and a fun, summer popcorn blockbuster feel, this turned out pretty good. Just like “Iron Man” and “Thor” before it, this really doesn’t offer anything new (in fact, just change the characters and you can make any of the movies any other of the movies), but they’ve all been consistently entertaining. It’s got something for everybody, including enough fan service to keep the most skeptical fanboy happy. I can’t say much else because it’s all been said before in my reviews of the other films. I’ll leave with that, thanks to this, I’m now really really looking forward to “The Avengers”. 4 stars.

Mr. and Mrs. Incredible – 2011 (NR)

Netflix says: Netflix hasn’t picked this up as of this review, so here is the IMDB description: In ancient China, a husband and wife, both of them retired superheroes, contend with the high cost of living, infertility, and other contemporary life issues.

Matt says: I saw some reviews floating around the web about this and people seemed to be disappointed in the lack of action or special effects. “It’s a superhero movie, after all!”, they said. Well, it really is lacking in those areas, but what it does have, and excels at, is a great story of when a marriage first starts losing its luster. After meeting and falling in love, two superheroes settle down in a small village. Things seem to be ok, but the lack of a child threatens to separate them. The honeymoon is over and they both begin to feel that they are in a rut and take each other for granted. It’s funnier than it sounds, with great moments of slapstick and some sharp witted tongues. I found it to be a charming romantic comedy (over the false advertising of it being a superhero actioner). Out of ten films viewed on the airplanes to Japan and back, this was probably the most entertaining. 4 stars.

I Am Number Four – 2011 (PG-13)

Netflix says: After nine aliens flee their home planet to find a peaceful life on Earth, their plans are shattered by pursuers who must kill them in number order. Number Four is a teen named John (Alex Pettyfer), who uses his extraordinary abilities to battle his enemies. John's guardian, Henri (Timothy Olyphant), aids him in his deadly fight while he tries to protect his human girlfriend, Sarah (Dianna Agron), and connect with the others who share his powers.

Matt says: Based on a comic book, this spawns a whole mythology, but never has much of a chance to fully explore it. Think X-Men: First Class meets Superman. An alien grows up a normal life, yet has to hide his true identity from humans as he and his kind are being hunted down. It is action packed and exciting and, do to a wide open ending, seems to really be a prequel to a series… though I believe that plan was abandoned due to poor ticket sales from this entry (I could be wrong). It’s a shame, because even though it wasn’t all that great, it still had potential to be a pretty cool series. Maybe it was the mannequins that had starring in it, but that usually doesn’t effect the casual viewer. 3 stars.

The Green Hornet – 2011 (PG-13)

Netflix says: Seth Rogen and writing partner Evan Goldberg (Superbad) apply their trademark humor to the superhero genre in this big-screen action-adventure about a newspaper-publishing playboy (Rogen) who dons a disguise to fight crime after hours. As the Green Hornet, Britt Reid's power is no longer limited to the printed page -- and thanks to a nimble martial-arts expert (Jay Chou), he has the skills to expose the city's roughest criminals.

Matt says: I don’t know why people hated this movie so much… I mean, what did they expect? It’s a Seth Rogan penned movie about a dated superhero, not the next Nolan Batman. For what it is, it’s not too half bad. I chuckled a few times and the action sequences were well done. Of course, it runs too long (a meaty 2+ hours), the plot is a mess, and Rogan just doesn’t feel like an action hero. With all its faults, it’s still pretty fun movie. It’s not high art, but it’s a step above some of the other CGI laden bullshit Hollywood keeps stuffing down our throats (Transformers 2 anyone?). 3 stars.

Thor – 2011 (PG-13)

Netflix says: Kenneth Branagh directs this Marvel Comics-inspired action flick about the thunder god Thor (Chris Hemsworth), a powerful warrior whose father, Odin (Anthony Hopkins) -- the king of Asgard -- forces him to live among humans on Earth and learn humility. Once there, he finds a friend (Natalie Portman), along with unexpected enemies sent from his world. Kat Dennings, Stellan Skarsgård and Rene Russo co-star.

Matt says: Shakespearean theater and film alumnae Branagh knows his regicide. “Thor” has enough similar with The Bard’s tales (a fallen king, a son manipulating armies in an attempt to take the throne, another son banished who must prove his worth) to make it perfect for Branagh’s direction. I’m not saying “Thor” is anywhere close to Shakespeare’s plays in quality, just that it’s similar in ideas. It wasn’t a bad film, mostly due to Branagh. If not for him, it would’ve been as awful as the trailers made it out to be. Yet, every cliché and excessive CGI effect seemed to work. Missing was a dynamic personality, like Downey Jr. in the “Iron Man” films, but for a comic book movie I expected much worse. I never was a fan of the idea of a “god” being a superhero, so I tended to stay away from the “Thor” comics. Therefore, I can’t say if it stayed true to the source material or not. To be honest, I did enjoy the movie enough to be entertained throughout. Hopkins seems a little uncomfortable in his role, but ends up spending 2/3s of the movie in a coma, so it was more of a cameo than a lead. Portman and the others play their roles as children at recess and their enjoyment reflects on the audience. “Thor” was a fun summer blockbuster with no real redeeming value beyond a enjoyable, action-packed time. 3 1/2 stars.

Super – 2011 (NR)

Netflix says: When his wife (Liv Tyler) falls in league with a drug dealer, average guy Frank D'Arbo (Rainn Wilson) dons the guise of a superhero, dubs himself the Crimson Bolt and tries to keep a tagalong comic-book store clerk (Ellen Page) from becoming his sidekick. But it's hard to be a superhero when all you've got to work with is a pipe wrench. Kevin Bacon co-stars in this action-driven dramedy from writer-director James Gunn.

Matt says: The ads for this made it look similar to “Kick-Ass”, so I really wasn’t too eager to see it. “Kick-Ass” was a great movie and anything trying to be like it would be subpar in comparison. After watching “Super”, I have to say that it has shades of “Kick-Ass”, but handles the subject matter in a much darker, less Hollywood friendly way. Wilson plays a total loser who never catches a break. When the one good thing in life (his wife) is taken away from him, he gets a message from god… in the form of tentacle brain rape… to become a superhero. Donning his patched together outfit, he then proceeds to brutally attack any one he thinks is committing a crime with his trusty wrench. The writer/director of this comes from the Troma school of filmmaking and it shows. He also wrote the screenplay for the Dawn of the Dead remake and directed the brilliant “Slither” (let’s just ignore his involvement with the Scooby Doo live action films). “Super” feels a little too Indie for its own good, but is funny, dark, disturbing, and violent enough to make it a fun watch. It actually reminded me more of “Special”, in which Michael Rapaport starts taking medication that he believes gives him super powers. Both films are portrayals of men with deep psychological issues who think they’re superheroes… “Super” just takes it to the next level with its Troma-like dark humor and violence. “Super” ended up being a pleasant surprise and it was refreshing to see that movies like this are still being made. Troma fans, keep your eyes peeled for Lloyd Kaufman’s cameo. 4 stars.

Megamind – 2010 (PG)

Netflix says: When a cunning supervillain (voiced by Will Ferrell) accidently kills his crime-fighting nemesis, the rogue suddenly finds life boring and uninspired. So, he creates a new enemy (Jonah Hill) who seeks to destroy the world, forcing Megamind to play the hero role for once in his life. This hilarious 3D animated feature from director Tom McGrath (Madagascar) also features the voices of Brad Pitt and Tina Fey.

Matt says: Dreamworks is no Pixar, but they do get the job done. When “Megamind” started, I thought it would be another one of those generic CGI movies that tries too hard and never delivers (I’m looking at you “Planet 51”). After the first big battle, the real movie started and I ended up impressed at the end. Blah blah great cast blah blah cute and funny blah blah… after seeing enough of these, you know what to expect, so I needn’t go into details. Looking for a decent CGI comedy with a message that’s enjoyable for the whole family? You can do much worse than “Megamind” (no, seriously, fuck you “Planet 51”). 4 stars.

The Spirit – 2008 (PG-13)

Netflix says: After rookie Central City cop Denny Colt (Gabriel Macht) is murdered, he's mysteriously reborn as masked superhero the Spirit. Setting out to rid the streets of crime, he finds his archnemesis in the Octopus (Samuel L. Jackson), whose quest for immortality imperils the entire city. Scarlett Johansson, Eva Mendes and Paz Vega co-star in this adaptation of Will Eisner's classic comic by writer-director Frank Miller (Sin City, 300).

Matt says: So it’s come to this… The Spirit. I first saw this while visiting Marc. He had stuffed his Netflix queue so we could fill any down time by doing what we do best: watching and picking apart movies. The Spirit shows that, even though we have many similar tastes, we also can differ greatly. While Marc had loved this, I hated every minute of it. His defense was that it was Miller’s “fuck you” to people expecting a typical superhero movie. That Miller somehow engineered a master plan to throw a monkey wrench into the cogs of the movie making machine. “The fans? Screw the fans! Fuck everyone!” is what Miller seems to be saying, his genius dripping from every pore. I, on the other hand, see this as a pathetic attempt by a madman to try to recapture his edge. You see, Miller was a genius. His early works (Batman: Year One, The Dark Knight Returns, and Sin City) pushed the envelope of storytelling. People were enamored by the adult themes and noir stylings. Then, all comics started adapting to what he and Alan Moore had started. Miller was no longer “special”. How could he shock and awe when every big name superhero was getting killed off, graphically maiming enemies, and filled with deep angst? In order to try to recapture his lost fame, Miller decided to amp up the craziness of his creations. Everything was bumped to comical extremes, that I honestly think were valid attempts are recapturing his lost “cool”. Every guy is a chick magnet killing machine and every chick is scantily clad and stacked with boobage. Dialog is nothing but endless bad 1940s mystery novel narration. Unfortunately, all this seems to do is turn off readers, and in the case of The Spirit, viewers. Judge for yourself. Here are a few examples of his latest work: here, here, and here. Ok, done? Yeah, what the fuck, right? Miller obviously enjoys making movies and comics. Why would he intentionally sabotage his career by “sticking it” to his fans? One of the major things that makes me think that The Spirit was Miller’s attempt at something legitimate is the art direction (and the only thing worth a damn in the whole film). It’s really beautifully filmed. Each shot looks like a comic panel come to life. He uses the same techniques as Sin City, dulling colors and liberally using CGI to enhance the scenery. Too bad the dialog, plot, and acting are utter crap. Seriously, I’ve seen better writing from 5 year olds. Here’s an example of a line from the movie: “She provides for me. She protects me. She is my mother, my city is. She’s a good mother.” Maybe I don’t get him any more, but I’m not alone in my opinion. So, after watching it a second time, I haven’t changed my thoughts on The Spirit. I still don’t like it. 1 1/2 stars.

Hancock – 2008 (UR)

Netflix says: Will Smith stars as Hancock, a down-and-out superhero who's forced to employ a PR expert (Jason Bateman) to help repair his image when the public grows weary of all the damage he's inflicted during his lifesaving heroics. The agent's idea of imprisoning the antihero to make the world miss him proves successful, but will Hancock stick to his new sense of purpose or slip back into old habits? Charlize Theron co-stars in Peter Berg's action-comedy.

Marc says: Mediocre hack Peter Berg squanders the under-utilized premise of a “down on his luck” superhero by abandoning the entire concept about one hour in. Although the first half squeezes out some seldom few laughs, it’s all downhill once the plot revelations start rolling in. Will Smith exudes screen charisma throughout, but it’s nowhere near enough to save the proceedings from Theron’s teary-eyed overacting and a muddled script. Grade D.

Superman II: The Richard Donner Cut – 1980 (PG)

Netflix says: Superman flagship director Richard Donner presents this special cut of the 1980 sequel starring Christopher Reeve as the Man of Steel, who's locked in a battle to save Earth from three evil outcasts of planet Krypton. Donner shot footage for Superman II concurrently with the first blockbuster, but director Richard Lester ultimately completed the project. This re-edited version features Donner's original vision, including restored deleted scenes.

Matt says: Superman II, with all its faults, is actually still the best Superman movie to date. Sure, it has goofy comic relief peppered throughout, Lex Luthor is a joke, and Brando is under-utilized… but it’s fun, has great villains, gives Supes deep inner conflict, and Reeve’s portrayal breathes more life into the Man of Steel than any other actor. When I heard that the Donner version (I’m not going to go into the historical details of why he was dropped from the film) scraps some of the slapstick, tightens up some loose ends, and adds more Brando, I had to check it out. Donner says in an intro that the original film he shot was mostly lost. Therefore, this version is recreated of found footage, footage from the theatrical release, and even cutting room floor takes. I must say, it is a better film overall. Still, there’s unnecessary comic elements, but much that didn’t make sense or was overtly cheesy was scrapped. The voiceless 3rd Kriptonian villain “Non” has all his foibles trashed, making him much more menacing. Gone are the additional “humorous” scenes added to the Zod & friends’ “blowing in the city” scene, (the guy with the umbrella, the ice cream hitting a guy in the face, and the roller-skating guy) making the battle much more stimulating. And, best of all, gone is Supes’ stupid cellophane “S” he throws in the final showdown at the Supermancave. One major drawback was a reuse of a bullshit plot device from the first Superman movie (the “amnesia kiss” from the theatrical version of Superman II is actually better than the crap Donner feeds us), but the positive changes outnumber that cop-out. There are more additions and omissions, but seeing the differences for yourself is a treat for any one who enjoyed the original. Now, I’m not going to say it’s a great film, but I was impressed by most of the changes and had a good time watching it.  4 stars… if not for the awful, reused plot device from the first film. 3 1/2 stars as is.

Batman: Under the Red Hood - 2010 (PG-13)

Netflix says: There's a mystery afoot in Gotham City when a shadowy vigilante known only as Red Hood (voiced by Jensen Ackles) sets his mind to stalking Batman (Bruce Greenwood) and his former sidekick, Dick Grayson (Neil Patrick Harris) -- who now goes by the heroic name of Nightwing. But the duo can't get too distracted, lest they fall prey to three familiar nemeses: the Joker (John Di Maggio), Ra's al Ghul (Jason Isaacs) and Black Mask (Wade Williams).

Marc says: Superlative adaptation of a Batman comic book story arc from 2005 features top-notch animation, very good voice acting, and several excellent, action-packed fight scenes. The story itself draws from now indispensible elements of Batman lore, notably The Killing Joke graphic novel and the infamous 1988 issues comprising A Death in the Family. The art direction is impressive, as is the fight and action choreography, which seemingly takes it cue from the Hong Kong martial arts genre. Standout scenes include Batman taking down four ninja assassins decked out in cybernetic power armor as he moves like a Zen master, an extended chase along skyscrapers, and the ending showdown between Batman and the newly incarnated Red Hood. There are a few small complaints: several missed opportunities for detail in the animation, some goofy, juvenile dialogue, and the lack of Mark Hamill’s involvement for the Joker’s voice work. Since this is a DTV release, it seems fair to also comment on the extra features, which are great, especially since they include four vintage animated series episodes from the early 90’s! Overall, a very enjoyable, high quality package made by people who obviously cared about their product and aimed to produce a compelling and adult-oriented Batman tale. 4.5 stars

Matt says: Direct to DVD Batman cartoon takes the feel of the original “Batman: The Animated Series” and amps up the violence and adult themes. Nothing is sugar-coated in this and death is abundant (it’s PG-13 for a reason). It really has the feel of a graphic novel come alive. The story is as well written and expertly voiced (Hamill’s out as The Joker, but Di Maggio does a good job in his place). Although dialog can be stereotypical gangster claptrap at times, the themes and action more than make up for such minor faults. The animation is decent, but has its issues. They utilize CGI to cut corners and the cheapness shows. In non-CGI scenes, everything looks a step above “Batman: The Brave and the Bold”, but it’s not quite up to par with a theater-bound feature. I also had a nagging sense of déjà vu through the whole thing. ‘Why does this feel so familiar,’ I repeated to myself through rooftop chases and a mysterious masked vigilante bumping off mobsters. Then I realized that it’s got many of the same plot conventions as the superior “Batman: Mask of the Phantasm”. Still, it’s original enough to hold its own, it’s immersive, and it’s a very enjoyable watch. Recommended for superhero nerds like me. 4 stars.

Flash Gordon – 1980 (PG)

Netflix says: Flash gets a face-lift in this update of the 1930s comic strip. After being skyjacked (along with comely Dale Arden) to the planet Mongo, Flash (Sam Jones) learns that its merciless ruler, Emperor Ming (Max von Sydow), plans to destroy Earth and take Dale as his concubine. There's only one thing to do: unite Mongo's warring kingdoms, foil Ming's plan and get the girl.

Matt says: Oh, Flash… love of my loves… This is going to be an incredibly biased review as this movie is one of my all time favorites. Bare with me as I gush over the majesty that is Flash Gordon…

As I mentioned before, nostalgia can cloud your judgment on what is actually good and what you remember is good (see my review of Tron). This transcends nostalgia… it is actually an excellent movie. Of course, I adored this movie growing up. Flash was the epitome of manhood: buff, blonde, and chivalrous; a role model for a latchkey child. At the time I couldn’t see the intentional camp and humor behind this adaptation. As I grew older, I saw those things and the movie had a whole new meaning. Now I see it was made with loving care to capture the feeling of the early serials while updating it a bit for modern audiences. Most of the true humor is subtle: overt manly situations, lines that are exceptionally cheesy, and characters overly stereotyped… but it all works. Several other movies have tried to capture the fun of the serials of the 30s and 40s, few have succeeded (see the first 3 Indiana Jones movies for more campy, serial fun). Flash Gordon is not a serious movie and it knows it. People expected more from it and were disappointed. That is not the case for me. This movie is a 1940s Science Fiction story in all it’s glory. Men in space! Ray guns! Hawk people! How could you not enjoy the throwback camp? All this scored by arguably one of the greatest bands of the 1980s, Queen. The soundtrack propels the action, rising to rocking peaks when the action increases and relaxing to rhythmic tones when needed. Worth it alone for the hawk-men’s attack theme and the wedding march. All this with a cast who knows they’re making a campy throw back and play their roles as straight as possible (Richard O’Brian, Timothy Dalton, Max fucking von Sydow… and the highly erotic Ornella Muti). To add to the film are amazing sets and cinematography that would give Kubrick an erection. Every long shot is perfectly centered, the sets enhancing this by being crafted anally symmetrical. As one that appreciates symmetry (due to a slight bout of OCD), it makes the movie extremely aesthetically pleasing to the eye. To casual viewers, it’s not a perfect movie. To one who can appreciate something like this, it’s pure art. 5 “flying blind on a rocket cycle” stars!

The Dark Knight – 2008 (PG-13)

Netflix says: In this blockbuster sequel to Batman Begins, the caped crusader (Christian Bale) teams with Lt. James Gordon (Gary Oldman) and District Attorney Harvey Dent (Aaron Eckhart) to continue dismantling Gotham City's criminal organizations. But a psychotic new villain known as the Joker (Heath Ledger, in a Golden Globe- and Oscar-winning role) threatens to undo all their good work. Maggie Gyllenhaal, Morgan Freeman and Michael Caine also star.

Matt says: After seeing Inception and revisiting Batman Begins, I felt I had to also revisit the movie that propelled Nolan into a lifetime of free blowjobs and ice cream from studio execs. I had originally given this movie 5 stars after seeing it in the theater. There’s something about the experience of surround sound and larger than life characters that can sometimes muddle the actual quality of a movie (coughcoughAvatarcoughcough). This time around, I don’t feel it deserves the 5 stars I gave it before. It’s still a mighty fine movie and Ledger really shows his star quality with his spot on portrayal of the Joker. There is also the same adult attitude to the characters that made its predecessor so great; they are dynamic and feel like real people with real problems. The rest of the cast does an excellent job, giving the same attention to a comic book movie as they would to an Oscar primed drama. And, AND, there’s plenty of deep, meaningful subtext that drives its themes home. But, where Batman Begins was tight and linear, The Dark Knight is bloated and chaotic. It suffers from “next super hero movie syndrome”, where the makers feel they need to one-up the prior film by adding more enemies, more action, and more story. Would’ve been a worse movie if Two-Face wasn’t in it? Hell, he doesn’t even pop up as a character until over an hour and forty minutes in… when most movies are already wrapping up. What about the useless Scarecrow cameo and Batman copycats at the beginning? Shave off all of the extra needlessly unimportant subplots, and this could’ve been better than Batman Begins. Don’t get me wrong, I still love it, but it’s not the perfect film the wide eyed, fan boy in me saw 2 years ago. 4 1/2 stars.

Batman Begins – 2005 (PG-13)

Netflix says: Following his parents' brutal murder, Bruce Wayne (Christian Bale) trains with a skilled ninja (Ken Watanabe) and returns to Gotham City, only to find it overrun with crime and corruption. But after discovering a cave under Wayne Manor, Bruce assumes a new identity. Katie Holmes, Liam Neeson, Gary Oldman, Tom Wilkinson and Morgan Freeman co-star in Christopher Nolan's exploration of the superhero Batman's human origins.

Matt says: I saw this in the theaters and haven’t revisited again until now. This is an important movie in more than just the brilliant story; it officially started the trend of the “gritty reboot”. Before this, sequels or reboots of franchises would focus on fan base and amp up the pulp of their originals. Nolan chose to take something that is essentially geared towards children, give a mature story with real adult issues, and film it plausibly and realistically. In this case, the issues are facing the fears that never leave us, even as adults. When filming began on this, the world was gripped in a post 9/11 paranoia and Americans were paralyzed by fear. Nolan focuses on the idea of fear and how to redirect it. Bruce Wayne is more human as a character in this than ever previously filmed. He is forced to explore his fears, eventually choosing to become that which he can’t control in order to hopefully save others from his suffering. The climax at the end pushes Wayne to the brink as the city becomes plagued by fear via a biological terrorist attack. The Batman stories have always tried to explore Wayne’s deep-seated fears, but was only really successful in a few of the graphic novels (The Killing Joke and Arkham Asylum being two of the best). It is only fitting that Ra’s al Ghul and the Scarecrow be Batman’s enemies. Ra’s al Ghul has tested Bruce Wayne’s limits almost as much as the Joker and the Scarecrow is infamous for exploiting fear. Combined, they are a perfect combination for the central theme. They drive it home, culminating in a thrilling, meaningful film that surpasses any other “superhero” movie. 5 stars. Fun little geeky observation: the levels in the video game “Batman: Arkham Asylum” seem to be based on scenes from this movie.

Kick Ass – 2010 (R)

Netflix says: Inspired by his love of comic books, high school student Dave Lizewski (Aaron Johnson) decides to transform himself into a masked crime fighter -- a decision that eventually thrusts the teenager into Internet stardom. Soon, Dave's antics inspire a wave of would-be heroes to don costumes and live out their superhero fantasies. Nicolas Cage, Christopher Mintz-Plasse and Chloe Moretz also star in this comic book adaptation from director Matthew Vaughn.

Matt says: I quite enjoyed this. Does a much better job parodying the superhero movie genre than “Superhero Movie”, though the plot is similar (both are takes on the Spider Man origin). However, this excels in not resorting to anything supernatural… and in the case of “Superhero Movie”, it’s actually a movie and not a cash-in piece of crap. I’ve read articles about “real superheroes” (look it up, you’ll be surprised at how many there really are out there) and “Kick Ass” follows the life of a handful in a city that is supposed to be New York, yet looks nothing like it. The cast is great, the action is stellar, and the plot flows smoothly. If you want a fun time and have a geek streak, I highly recommend it. 4 stars.

Marc says: Effective deconstruction of the Spiderman and Batman mythos provides a good number of humorous moments mixed with glorious, hardcore violence. Kick Ass is mostly a comic foil, but when the focus shifts from him to Hit-Girl and Big Daddy, things really start hitting on all cylinders. Staff-spears, first-person night-vision shoot-out, a secret weapon with twin gatling guns, and McLovin’ as a super-villain? Sign me up! 4 solid stars.

The Return of Captain Invincible – 1983 (PG)

Netflix says: What happens to superheroes when they become has-beens? Captain Invincible, exiled from the U.S. during the McCarthy era, is now a hopeless alcoholic bum living in Australia. But when the sinister Mr. Midnight hatches a plan to annihilate citizens of New York City, the Captain is called back to America to save the day. First, though, he must reactivate those long-dormant superpowers! Alan Arkin and Christopher Lee co-star.

Matt says: A mix of "The Rocky Horror Picture Show" and "Hancock": Yes, it's a musical. Yes, it's bizarre and has women in their underwear. And yes, it's about an alcoholic superhero coming back from the gutter to do something good. Too bad it fails on all levels. Arkin looks like he didn't have to pretend to be drunk through the whole thing, if you know what I mean (glug, glug). The only redeeming value is the marvelous Christopher Lee who can pretty much turn any shitty movie into something worth a watch. 2 Stars, only for Lee. 1 Star without him.